Partner Support with Project: Breastfeeding

A partner's support is crucial to a breastfeeding moms' sense of success. But partners who aren't lactating may find it difficult to understand their supporting role and know how to better assist their breastfeeding partner with the process. What can partners do prenatally and postpartum to increase the odds of meeting their breastfeeding goals? Today you'll learn all about a national campaign with the mission of de-stigmatizing public breastfeeding by educating men and empowering women.

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Episode Transcript

The Boob Group
Partner Support with Project: Breastfeeding

Please be advised, this transcription was performed by a company independent of NewMommyMedia, LLC. As such, translation was required which may alter the accuracy of the transcription.

[Theme Music]

ROBIN KAPLAN: Breastfeeding is definitely something that you have to learn on the job and partner support can be absolutely crucial to a breastfeeding mom’s view of her success. But for a partner who isn’t lactating it can often be difficult to know what his or her supporting role is and how to assist her breastfeeding partner. So what can a partner do prenatally and postpartum to increase her partner’s chance of meeting her breastfeeding goals? Today I’m thrilled to welcome a brand new expert to the show. Hector Cruz is a commercial editorial portrait photographer based out of Tennessee, a first-time dad and the founder of Project Breastfeeding, a national campaign with the mission of destigmatizing public breastfeeding, educating men and empowering women. Today we are talking about partner support for the breastfeeding mom. This is The Boob Group episode 93.

[Theme Music/Intro]

ROBIN KAPLAN: Welcome to The Boob Group broadcasting from the birth education center of San Diego. The Boob Group is your weekly online on-the-go support group for all things related to breastfeeding. I’m your host Robin Kaplan. I’m also an international board-certified lactation consultant and owner of the San Diego breastfeeding center. We just want to say thanks to all of our loyal listeners who have joined our boob group club. Our members get bonus content after each new show plus special giveaways and discounts. Subscribe to our monthly newsletter for a chance to win a membership to our club each month. Another way for you to stay connected is by downloading our free app available in the Android and iTunes marketplace. Today I am joined by four lovely panellists in the studio. Ladies and gentlemen will you please introduce yourself. We’ll start with you Jenna.

JENNA IKUTA: My name is Jenna Ikuta. I’m 24. I work with children with special needs to the navy. I have one daughter and she is 10 months old.

DAVID IKUTA: My name is David Ikuta, Jenna Ikuta’s husband. I’m 25. I work for the US navy, I am a EUD Tech. We have one little girl named Scarlet and she is 10 months old.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Awesome alright and Chelsea.

CHELSEA POWELL: My name is Chelsea and I work as an assistant for a church. I have one child and he is 8 months old.

ADAM POWELL: My name is Adam Powell. I’m an operations manager for a vending machine company. I’m 29 and we have one child Addison. He is 8 months old.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Alright. Well, thank you everyone for coming on to the show today. I also just want to quickly introduce our producer MJ who is going to share a little bit about our virtual panelist program.

MJ FISHER: Yes. So many of you are already known off and contribute to our VP program so thank you. You really are helping support other mommas out there. Those of you who don’t know about our VP program, it’s a great way to join our online conversation when we record if you’re not local or you can’t just be in the studio with us but you still want to share your story or your opinion about our topics. You can. When we record we post on our social media the same questions we ask our in-studio panelist and we may even read your comment while we tape so check out our website under the community tab to find more info on being a VP and possible perks for participation.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Alright, thanks Mj.

[Theme Music]

ROBIN KAPLAN: So here’s a question from one of our listeners. This is from Pipa and this is what she wrote. Hello boob group from a windy rainy London. I love your show and listen every week. Usually at about 4am while I’m expressing. It certainly helps to pass the time. I love that. Thank you Pipa. My question is this, my express milk tastes like soap. I’ve been struggling to get my 4-month-old to take a bottle. Could this be the reason and what can I do about it? Thanks so much and keep up the great work. Pipa

VERONICA TINGZON: Hi boob group it was nice my name is Veronica Tingzon. I’m a board-certified lactation consultant and owner of The Original Comfort Food Lactation Services. Pipa, what this can actually be is a high lactase content. What that means is that you have enzymes lactase which are in your lipids to your fats helps with your milk and sub degrading the milk by breaking down those fat and causing the milk to ultimately start to spoil. Just like any other milk that she would purchase whether it’s cow’s milk or goat’s milk or anything like that. This milk has to be pasteurized so that they don’t spoil too quickly and the process was the same on the breast milk where you are going to a breakdown of the milk when it gets stored and it needs to be pasteurized. In order to pasteurize it what you’ll need to do is take your expressed breast milk freshly extract put it into a little saucepan and put it over medium heat. And then just before that starts to boil we called that scalding it, the milk will start releasing a bubble here a bubble there and you want to take it off of the heat just as it starts to do that bubble release process right before it boils. You can then have your milk cool off and then store it in the bottles preferably glass bottles there are very thick storage glass bottles that you could purchase and if you do that put it on the freezer. It should be fine when you go to heat it up and feed it to your baby. So Pipa, you can also look up on the internet Google “high lactase in express breast milk” and you can get some more information on it that soapy taste or maybe a rancid taste that you might get from your express breast milk that’s because you have very high lactase content in your milk. Good thing you’re catching this early and not when you got thinner thirty further milk bags in your freezer and unfortunately at that point in time any mom do throw away their milk so hopefully that takes care of your problem. Thanks Pipa for calling The Boob Group.

[Theme Music]

ROBIN KAPLAN: So today on The Boob Group we’re discussing how partners can support their breastfeeding spouses or significant others. Our expert Hector Cruz is a commercial editorial portrait photographer based out of Tennessee, a first time dad and the founder of Project Breastfeeding, A national campaign with the mission of destigmatizing public breastfeeding, educating men and empowering women. Thanks for joining us Hector, welcome to the show.

HECTOR CRUZ: Thank you. Thank you for having me.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Sure. So Hector you’re a new dad with a brand new project called Project Breastfeeding inspired by your experiences on becoming a new dad and your wife’s early struggle of breastfeeding. How did these new experiences inspire you to create Project Breastfeeding?

HECTOR CRUZ: Oh wow. There were a lot of experiences that went in to inspire me to create Project Breastfeeding. But there was quite I guess the major one in particular with the fact that I didn’t feel like I was ever part of that journey with her. There weren’t really any resources for dads out there when it came to learning about breastfeeding and how we support our wives. I just feel it was something that women took care of themselves. You know mom and baby automatically knew what to do and so through the lack of resources and my personal experience it just that inspiration came and Project Breastfeeding was kind of born from that.

ROBIN KAPLAN: And so what were your experiences like your wife’s prenatal appointments and did you attend the prenatal breastfeeding class with her.

HECTOR CRUZ: The experience at the prenatal appointments I mean when we found out we went to about we went to 10 and a half years of infertility and trying to have a child and going through the ups and downs that kind of go with that journey as well and when we finally found out that we were pregnant, you know I was elated, I was excited and I want nothing more than to be a part of everything that went along with that. And so when it came to doing the prenatal classes, I went to every single one of them. To the appointments, I went to them but my experience in there was that I was quickly relocated to that blue chair in the corner. And I wasn’t allowed to be a part of the process you know the doctors didn’t really talk to me if I had questions. They would answer them but they would look at my wife, they wouldn’t look at me and so I just kind of really felt like I was pushed aside and wasn’t allowed to be a part of that. When it came to the breastfeeding class, my wife called to make, reserved a spot to go and when she was at the phone they told her you know your husband isn’t allowed to come. There are no men allowed in the breastfeeding classes. We don’t want any women feel uncomfortable. And it didn’t make sense to me because all the women were still pregnant.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Right though there weren’t going to be any naked breast in there yet.

HECTOR CRUZ: Exactly! And so I was really bummed about that actually the entire pregnancy that’s the only class that I wasn’t allowed to attend or didn’t attend. So I took it upon myself at that point that I’m going to drop my wife off, I’m going to grab my laptop and I’m going to shoot over to Starbucks and wait for her and I’m going to try and learn as much as I can about breastfeeding. There was nothing out there for men. It was all material that was written by women for women. And so I just kind of you know went into a sea of stuff of information that I didn’t not know how to navigate at all.

ROBIN KAPLAN: How did that make you feel?

HECTOR CRUZ: Well it made me feel well kind of lost. Actually again it was kind of reinforced in me that maybe that’s just not my role. Maybe I just don’t a play a role in that and I just need to kind of give that up and I’ll take care of everything else that goes along with what I guess what would we feel men should be taking care of which is you know let’s make sure that we have the right car, let’s make sure we have you know the crib setup and everything else you know because that’s my role and I don’t need to worry about this part of the relationship between my wife and my child that was about to be born.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Okay. I’d love to open this up now on our panellist on the studio so for the dads on the room, how involve do you feel you were during this prenatal time? Did you attend these appointments and the classes and did you feel like the practitioners and the teachers involved you in the conversation? David, do you mind starting?

DAVID IKUTA: Yeah the prenatal appointments and the classes are more focus on the baby. They didn’t really focus on after the baby. And I notice it a lot with a lot of the appointments and everything that we went to. And so we didn’t really get involved. It was more of like you sat in the chair like Hector was referring to and you just kind of sat there and okay you know that’s how things went.

ROBIN KAPLAN: How about the classes did you attend classes?

DAVID IKUTA: Oh yes we attended the classes. The classes I felt were more helpful but there again there are more geared towards the women. The men were just kind of like yeah why I am here.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Yeah taking in information is not necessarily is involved with it. How about you Adam?

ADAM POWELL: I definitely think that a lot of prenatal when it comes to breastfeeding is all very theoretical. And you hear a lot about it and it seems it’s going to be very easy and
say yeah I don’t need to worry about that stuff much. And then so I didn’t feel left out or anything I just noticed that after the baby was actually here was oh this is a lot harder than I thought it was going to be.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Absolutely. Moms in the room, did you feel like your partner support prenatally made a difference in how he was able to help you with breastfeeding in the beginning so coming to these appointments and coming to those classes. How about you Chelsea?

CHELSEA POWELL: I definitely think so because we actually attended a class that you’re teaching and I remember in the Adam was very attentive and he was taking a lot of notes and I think one of the most important thing we learned from that class was like you know if it’s going rough get helped as soon as possible whether you know you as the dad called to get help or you help the mom but just get help. So I think that was a big thing for us.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Yeah. How about you Jenna?

JENNA IKUTA: That’s a tough one for me because I feel like there are so much emphasize on me having to remember everything that it took a lot of the power that he could have had away from him from being empowered to feel like okay should I get help from my wife? Should I get help for my daughter? We have the roughest start to breastfeeding and he was there for every appointment every single time but it was a lot of we don’t know what we’re doing. But if we were educated in the beginning or if he was feeling more comfortable in the classes to be able to ask those questions, I feel like we could have been like more prepared for it.

ROBIN KAPLAN: That’s a really good point. Hector did you do any preparation on your own? You have mentioned you went to Starbucks to kind of look on this information about breastfeeding. Would you now recommend to you friends who were having children to do anything differently that maybe you had?

HECTOR CRUZ: Oh yeah for sure. I mean I tried to do as much as I could on my own when it came to breastfeeding and learning because I knew that that was an important decision that my wife had made and I knew that it was very important that she wanted to breastfeed that she wanted to form that bond.

But again like I said there was not a lot of resources and I what I tell my friends now, I got a few friends that was expecting, I tell them you know what the best thing that I could do because like the guy said like David and Adam said you know you go to each class and all times you’re just even the prenatal classes are geared towards the women and the baby I think the most interaction I had in that class was stand up and hold your wife this way while she breathes.

And I’m looking at her just practicing these really weird exercises and I just like oh my God let’s get out of here. It didn’t make any sense you know and that was the most interaction. So what I tell them right now especially when it comes to breastfeeding I definitely urge
men to spend a little bit I mean it’s not even a big cost I think a lot of people think it’s a huge cost but find a certified lactation consultant and bring them in. Pay the cost to have somebody come and teach you what are the ins and outs of breastfeeding and how you can play a certain role. I know that having to do with after my daughter was born no clue at all. We were clueless.

I was extremely clueless. I figured hey well my wife’s got a breast my daughter should know automatically what to do. And so I ended up hiring a lactation consultant to come into the house to and teach us how to do this you know like everything up to that point you go to the prenatal classes. It seems pretty easy. It seems like everything kind of go kind of smooth. But once the baby was born it just you forget everything that was ever told to you in any of those classes so you know what I tell my friends now especially I said when it comes to breastfeeding is that go out, look for a lactation consultant, somebody that’s going to take all of your questions and all of the concerns that you have and really sit down with you and explain to you what breastfeeding entails.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Alright and for the dads on the room to you know Adam you were mentioning that where when you in the class that everything kind of seemed easy and you were taking notes and stuff like that. Are there ways that you, did you feel like you are prepared to help your wife with breastfeeding or do you feel like there are things that could been added even though it’s my class I would love to hear it. I’m going to start furiously taking notes as well because it was so important.

ADAM POWELL: I definitely felt I was prepared as I could have been. It’s just really one of those things that you don’t know what you’re up against until you’re actually trying to do it.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Yeah. How about you David?

DAVID IKUTA: As far as preparedness before her you know you think you know everything you think you’re ready for it and yet you still you don’t know anything. You’ve learned that you know nothing. But as far as for like when we got further along in the process with learning how to breastfeed with her and whatnot. The biggest thing I’ve learned as far as being the partner is that the simple little thing is that when she doesn’t eat, her milk supply goes down. Keep making sure that you have snacks on the car, making sure that you have this and that with you. It made a bigger difference in afterward because there is such a big learning curve but that’s just part of having a kid.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Yeah absolutely. Alright, when we come back Hector’s going to discuss his brand new project as well as how partner support can make a huge difference in mom’s comfort level in breastfeeding in public. We’ll be right back.

[Theme Music]
ROBIN KAPLAN: Welcome back to the show. We’re here with Hector Cruz and we are talking about partner support for the breastfeeding mom. So Hector what do you hope Project Breastfeeding will do to help educate about the importance of partner support?

HECTRO CRUZ: Well I believe that I really believe that men are the key when it comes to breastfeeding support in general whether to the medical field, whether it’s you know out personal and friends. We are the key to it. You know women are just expected while it’s just the role they take on as mothers it’s expected to just know what to do and you’re the mom. But for men, we just don’t have that and so with Project Breastfeeding my goal is, my ultimate goal with Project Breastfeeding is to have breastfeeding support classes for fathers.

Where they can come in and ask all the questions that we have. And I honestly feel like men have really insightful questions when it comes to childbirth and breastfeeding and all of that. So my major goal is to having to build an organization that will help educated men especially first-time fathers, I think the second-timers know a little bit more. You are a little bit more prepared. But as a first-time father especially myself I was scared I was just like I have no idea.

I was scared of the labor. Is my wife going to turn into this you know like the person I don’t know? What do I do there? And so there is just a lot that goes into that and like I said there are just not enough resources out there for fathers by fathers to help puts along with that. So that is my ultimate goal of Project Breastfeeding and really help you stigmatized just breastfeeding in public and giving those support. How can we support our spouses on that journey so that they feel successful when they started?

ROBIN KAPLAN: Alright. Ladies, I know that you both have incredibly supportive husbands which is why one of the reasons we wanted you both on the show as well but how critical was your partner’s breastfeeding support during those early weeks and months. Jenna, you want to start?

JENNA IKUTA: I would have given up on the hospital. If it wasn’t for him telling me just shake your head and said yes we’ll give her the formula. To get us out of the hospital I would have just stop right then just because it was so rough in the beginning. And he constantly was asking okay what else can we do? Do we go see an acupuncturist? Do we see a chiropractor? What else is there that we can do to make this successful for you? And he knew that I was so emotionally ingrained into this journey.

For the last eight years, this is want I wanted to do and what my goal for being able to raise my kids was and he was just absolutely critical. There would’ve been so many times that I would’ve given up had it not been for him telling me okay are this really what you want? At those 2 AM just moments where you’re feeding and you’re just so exhausted and he wakes up and he’s like can I get you some water? Can I get you something to eat? And you just lose it because if it weren’t for that partner support, you wouldn’t be able to meet those goals that you wanted to feed your child with.
ROBIN KAPLAN: Absolutely. How about you Chelsea?

CHELSEA POWELL: I think for me I probably would’ve ended up in an insane asylum because I was just so stressed out about it. I mean just so incredibly stressed about not being able to feel like I could nurture my child. And so his support just like keeping me going, you know waking up with me in the middle of the night just to sit there with me because I was like this is so hard I don’t want to be alone. I think that’s what helps me to be able to keep going and to overcome some of that stress.

To be able to relax enough to kind of get some of it together to and just him he is like I’ll got to you know the lactation appointment with you and you know take pictures so that we know what it was supposed to look like when we get home I can be like this is what the picture looks like you know let’s try you know help me try to position Addison and just to do all these different things while Addison would be napping. He would be like reading the baby book about like you know how the baby should be latching and all this stuff. I look over Adam and just that he cared so much about it because he knew it was so important to me. I think that was really what helps me keep going.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Absolutely. Hector, I know you’ve touched briefly on this whole destigmatizing of breastfeeding in public too and I as a lactation breastfeeding advocate I should say it’s so hard when I hear that women don’t feel comfortable going out in public because It relegates them to their house and feeling like they just can’t get back into the life that they enjoyed prior to baby and so or previous to the baby. So why have you decided to include this as one of your goals for how partners support the breastfeeding mom?

HECTOR CRUZ: Well I suggest. I believe that a woman should never have to feel ashamed or you know to do what’s the best thing for her child and she’s just or baby shouldn’t have to wait to eat because it makes somebody uncomfortable. I grew up in a culture where breastfeeding is just part of the course. It’s just what’s done you know women in Mexico where my family comes from it was very normal and in a lot of country.

I believe that US is one of the only countries in the world that we actually had to have laws on the book for women to be able to breastfeed and it’s just ludicrous. It’s really just kind of I can’t wrap my head around that. For me it started the first time we were going to go out of the house. You know I’m excited we’re finally going to take the baby out and that is kind of like it’s the time you get that new car you know you want to take it out so your friends see it and I was excited I wanted to show my baby and my wife’s like we got to be back by you know in two hours because I have to feed Sofia and I don’t want to go out there, she was literally having some anxiety when it came to that.

And being armed with the knowledge I have now about breastfeeding and how to help her out you know. I looked at her in the eye and I said no we’re not doing that. And nobody is going to make you feel ashamed for doing what you’re doing. At that point it just kind of make me realize too that there is just over the sexual invasion of women in general when it comes to this country and there are so many double standards when it comes to that. We can walk in the mall and see you know stores that have advertising you know that are very provocative and that’s okay. We walk into those stores with our sons and our daughters and nobody is going to go to the manager and say hey you need to pull that down because it is offensive. Where the woman who wants to sit down that she’s nursing covered or you know she’s not she’s choosing not to cover there can look at half the time asking [inaudible] go out into another place because you know. And they’re making it seem like it something that is completely immoral or just not modest.

And so for me destigmatizing of public breastfeeding became just a very crucial part of what Project Breastfeeding entails and that’s why I also chose to use fathers in those photos because I believe that remember the day and age where you know we’re just surrounded by so many amazing things that we look at whether it’s movies or shows and special effects and I said to myself what is the motivationally striking think that I can do to help this? And I said if dads would come on board and say hey if I can do this I would get that [inaudible] out of it. Educate those men, their women and their wives are going to feel empowered to go out and say hey my husband has my back I’m going to do I’m going to focus on feeding my child and if anybody comes and I know if anybody came to my wife and said something I’m just going to give him that look you know that means stay away.

That is a big goal of mine but I believe that if you had educated men then you will have empowered women. With educated men and empowered women, the whole stigma of just breastfeeding in public will go away. The problem is no longer there.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Absolutely. So for the dads in the room, how did you feel about breastfeeding in public before your baby was born? And did you talk about nursing in public with your wives before you ventured out? Or that you haven’t really talked about it before. David how about you first?

DAVID IKUTA: I we had talked about it and it was something that we had both wanted. My mother, works for a university up in the Bay area and that’s one of the things that she specializes in is prenatal care and so understanding hey this is how things are and it’s a very good thing for you and especially like for the good portion of Jenna was pregnant I was in Africa and in the different countries that I saw it was completely normal and nobody cared it was just you know like going and buying something at the store.

It nobody cared. And when I came back to the states and after we had her I remember we had chocolate on your place in Vegas and Jenna was feeding scarlet and the lady behind the counter was like oh you know can you please cover-up or you know that’s not okay can you we have a bathroom if that’s okay. And I just remember being like why do you why is it that if this offends you that much then I mean it’s something that’s supposed to be done naturally. I don’t know how else to explain this to you other than babies are supposed to have milk. They get their milk from their mother and that’s across the board.

ROBIN KAPLAN: What are the person’s idea?

DAVID IKUTA: She was just the look of shock on her face of just like when she told my wife that you know can you please do that somewhere else and my wife just was like nope not happening. The look of awe on her face was just like because you know where we were at it was more of a conservative place. It wasn’t like San Diego or the Bay area or California in general where you can go around and do that and nobody is going to say anything to you because that’s completely normal. When you start going to the other states or the other just another city where it’s not commonplace to wear a baby or you know breastfeed your kid.

ROBIN KAPLAN: That’s funny though that you were in Vegas. I mean…

MJ FISHER: I know what up dubs.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Common step out on the strip and tell me what you see.

MJ FISHER: I know they don’t call the strip for nothing.

ROBIN KAPLAN: How about you Adam how do you feel about, do you have any thoughts about it before?

ADAM POWELL: I think we’ve just talk about you know kind of whatever you’re comfortable with feel free to do and I’m not sure we even really knew like what approach we wanted to take but I just remember after having so much trouble breastfeeding from the beginning I was like why add anything that would make it even more cumbersome. And I think as a society were to weirdly sensitive about on the wrong things and so I’m just I don’t know my mentality is just getting over yourself and let people do what they want.

ROBIN KAPLAN: And for the moms in the room when you first nurse in public did you find that you needed support from your partner and how important was that support to you? Chelsea?

CHELSEA POWELL: I think I definitely did just because like I said I was so stressed why everything and so urgently when I started feeding when we went out I had like a cover on which was just like the worst idea ever because Addison is just extremely wiggly from the start he has never been like a calm baby so you know he was trying to pull it off and rip it down or he would get so hot in it that he fall asleep and so here I am struggling and like trying to see his latch and I’m just like this is so difficult and I remember talking to you Adam about it and I just keep on saying like it’s so hard and he was like what then don’t wear the cover, it’s fine, don’t worry about it.

I was like what would people think you know everything is just hanging out there and he’s like well you know whatever you want to do but like just don’t worry about it. And so I remember the first time that I tried to do it without the cover, we were actually at our friend’s house, and Adam came in to the room and he was just like Chelsea is going to feed Addison without the cover on so just you know if you don’t like it get over it. But yeah it’s just what’s happening right now and so…

ADAM POWELL: Or take a good look.

CHELSEA POWELL: And they were totally fine with it. They were just like oh yeah you know okay whatever and I think that that really help just ease things. I was just like okay I can do this and it was so much easier because he wasn’t flailing around under this cover and I wasn’t like oh no his you know I can’t see what his mouth looks like to know if he’s going to like just totally destroy me or not like what’s going on and so it just made it so much easier and I’ll be like hay I don’t have to worry about all this thing anymore.

ROBIN KAPLAN: That’s awesome. How about you Jenna?

JENNA IKUTA: I have some very similar experiences with the cover and she wanted to kick it off and wanted to look on everything and be everywhere except for the boob. But it I felt like I was juggling so many things in the beginning when we went out we had a nest-nest. So we had the syringe, we had the tube, we had the water bottle have to clean both, we had everything going on and it had to be like strap just the right way I couldn’t do it by myself. I had her and a bag, there were just too much stuff going on so to have him there to help with that and then play like goalie while all this people were either looking or I mean you just don’t see that enough.

You don’t see people just whipping it out I mean like my kids got to eat I’m sorry just go away or look somewhere else. I remember we were at Viejas Casino outlets and people just kept like stopping in front of the bench and just staring and he would just give them that face that Hector was talking about it’s like just go away. I mean you can look but at least be nice and somewhat supportive of it like yeah good job rock on but no. They were just staring in all the wrong ways. So It was really integral to have him there.

ADAM POWELL: I think Chelsea had a co-worker had said kind of strangely oh I wish I could be there right now. And there was like an awkward moment.

ROBIN KAPLAN: And Mj do you have something you wanted to add?

MJ FISHER: Yeah and we have one of our virtual panelists Adrianna Anderson she says that partner support in when you’re nursing in public is very important. He stays next to me like a bodyguard for the first few times. He would recover me with the cover when the cover fell but now at six months we don’t cover and he knows I can handle it by myself.

ROBIN KAPLAN: Awesome. What were you going to say Hector?

HECTOR CRUZ: Well I think you know you really have to be looking when you have to say something. I mean you literally have to be standing over a person to say hey I can see something. My wife has got and honestly [inaudible] closed that is. That is you know my wife has put my daughter in a front carrier and you know breastfeed her without a problem. Unless you were like I said unless you’re stopping, you’re literally trying to peek get a peek in you’re not going to see anything.

It really is something that you know people just make a huge deal about it. And I guess I don’t get it and we had the same issues the first time we went out. We had one person say something and we live in a smaller town I mean I’m originally from southern California and grew up in Orange County but where I lived now is a smaller town and so I’ve become you know breastfeeding dad so everybody knows me how so we’re safe in this town when we go anywhere you know people and actually people here in this town because of this project had gotten the hand.

We had a, I got an email yesterday from one of one of the woman that like our page and a big fan of the project here. She was telling us that she was at a local grocery store and she decided to breastfeed. She usually uses a cover she goes like forgot it in the car, my baby was crying and they would either put leave the cart there everything that I has just done and go to the car and feed them and come back or just feed them there and then. And she went ahead and did it and she had a carry on sorry she put the baby in the carrier, started to breastfeeding.

The manager came over and said can I help you and he walk around the store with the cart you know and helped her get the rest of the stuff while she fed the baby and as it done he said we’ll help you to your car don’t worry mam and so we started to see at least in our community here with this project kind of getting out and really impacting our community that there are things going on here were [inaudible] implementing we’ve been talking even with our city council about maybe inputting a breastfeeding welcome [inaudible] restaurants and other places, this can put on their storefronts to let moms know like hey you’re welcome here. Nobody is going to make you feel bad for breastfeeding your child.

ROBIN KAPLAN: That’s awesome. Well so Hector before we wrap up, what do you hope to accomplish with Project Breastfeeding and how can we become involve?

HECTOR CRUZ: Well right now our initial goal we are trying to get Project Breastfeeding out to different cities. We want to make this, turn this into a real big no-board campaign. World Breastfeeding Week is August 1st to August 7th and our major goal is to get out into at least 50 major markets and we do love to come out you know San Diego, LA, San Francisco which are some major markets, New York, Nashville, Atlanta and do some shoots there. Get somebody who can get - we’re looking for sponsors. We’re looking for people that are willing to host these shoots and help sponsor events so that we can come up out there.

We’re looking for people who will be willing to be photographed. Dads if you are willing to come in, take your shirt off, hold your baby and say hey if I can do this I would. We need that and so right now that’s our major goal and we’re hoping to role that out see right now I’m working on a couple of cities that our coming up and so but we need a lot of help to do that. This is 100%, it’s been run by volunteers and group of people that been helping me really with this project and financially that’s what we need the help. We’re in the process of trying to get a non-profit because again the ultimate goal is to start an organization that will offer breastfeeding support classes for fathers and for family because really breastfeeding is a family affair. It’s not just the mom’s responsibility. And if you had seen it through this and you know kids or older kids or people that lived in your house [inaudible] styles they could definitely benefit knowing how to help the mom and the child.

So that’s our ultimate goal right now we got our Facebook page which is and were also raising funds to that page. You can actually click there are tabs on there that will take you to our goal funding page and PayPal if people prefer PayPal so that they can donate and help us get to other cities. That’s our major goal right now is just get to other cities and make this a national campaign.

ROBIN KAPLAN: We very cool Hector. We are so thrilled that we are able to have you on the show so thank you so much. And to our panelist in the studio as well it was an absolute pleasure to have you in the show and for sharing your experiences and for Hector sharing about this new amazing venture called Project Breastfeeding.

HECTOR CRUZ: Thank you.

ROBIN KAPLAN: For our boob group club, yeah for our boob group club members our conversation will continue after the end of the show is Hector going to discuss his top 5 tips for partners to prepare for the new baby. For more information on the boob group club, please visit our website at .

[Theme Music]

ROBIN KAPLAN: Before we wrap things up, here’s Wendy Wright talking about breastfeeding tips for the working mom.

WENDY WRIGHT: Hi boob group listeners. I’m Wendy Wright an international board certified lactation consultant and owner of Lactation Navigation in Palo Alto California. I’m here to answer some of your most common questions about returning to work as a breastfeeding mother. Such as what are the rules for milk storage?

Milk storage is a difficult concept. We pump during the day and then we need to store our milk in order to provide it the next day for our infants. Let me summarize a general guideline for milk storage.

Room temperature milk can be stored for up to ten hours at room temperature. Milk is very-very stable. If you know you’re going to be near a refrigerator if you have refrigeration available of course that’s a better alternative than room temperature however sometimes on the worksite, refrigeration is not available whether you forgot your icepack that day. I just want you to know that it would be stable for upto ten hours so you now have to throw it away throughout the day as you pump. I also would like to let you know that in the refrigerator, milk can be kept up to 8 days.

Again if we know we’re going to freeze it soon get it in the freezer right away but if you find a bottle of milk in your refrigerator that’s 3 or 4 days old. Feel 100% certain that you can absolutely feed that to your baby. Room temperature 10 hours, refrigeration 8 days and then in the freezer up to 3 or 4 months.

So keep in mind to avoid storing your milk on the door of your freezer and try to have it back on the centre where the temperature varies less and where it is colder. And again 3 to 4 months all bag should be labelled with the sharpie date of pumping and that will let you know exactly when the milk will expired.

Containers to use for milk storage can be plastic or glass. They can be hard-sided or soft-sided, well-fitting tops or the freezer milk bags are excellent offered by many different brands. It’s best to freeze milk slant in the bottom of your freezer and then you can stand it up like a deck of cards and it will take a lot less space in each of your freezer or refrigerator areas.

In order to warm milk simply thaw or warm it under blending water. Swirl gently to combine the low-fat and the high-fat milk and remember never use a microwave on breast milk. The last thing I like to mention is a storage schedule that you can work into your daily pumping routine. For example Sunday night, pull milk out of the freezer and thaw overnight for baby to drink on Monday when you’re not together. Monday pump milk to provide the baby on Tuesday by simply refrigerating overnight. Tuesday’s milk that is pumped feeds the baby on Wednesday. Wednesday’s milk feed the baby on Thursday. Thursday’s milk feed the baby on Friday. And then Friday’s milk is brought home, packaged and frozen. Breastfeed all weekend directly from the breast and then again Sunday night you can take your oldest milk out of the freezer and provide it for the baby on Monday morning. This way the baby is only receiving frozen milk only once a week. Fresh is best if it all possible and we’re not only rotating our refrigerator but our freezer supply.

Also need to mention that once milk is thawed from the freezer, it can be refrigerated for up to 24 hours and must be consumed within 24 hours otherwise should be discarded. I hope you found that helpful. Thanks so much for listening. This is for more great information about my business lactation navigation and be sure to listen on The Boob Group for fantastic conversation about breastfeeding and breastfeeding support.

[Theme Music]

ROBIN KAPLAN: That wraps up our show for today. We appreciate you listening to The Boob Group.
Don’t forget to check out our sister shows:

Preggie Pals for expecting parents
Parent Savers for parents with newborns, infants and toddlers
Twin Talks for parents of multiples.
Thanks for listening to The Boob Group; Your judgment-free breastfeeding resource.


This has been a New Mommy Media production. Information and material contained in this episode are presented for educational purposes only. Statements and opinions expressed in this episode are not necessarily those of New Mommy Media and should not be considered facts. Though information in which areas are related to be accurate, it is not intended to replace or substitute for professional, Medical or advisor care and should not be used for diagnosing or treating health care problem or disease or prescribing any medications. If you have questions or concerns regarding your physical or mental health or the health of your baby, please seek assistance from a qualified health care provider.

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